OCHIENG, I DISAGREE!

This has nothing to do with politics!

 

It's a commentary on an article My names? There is no such thing written by my favorite Kenyan thinker; perhaps one of the only few Kenyan public figures whose name can go with "think" without sounding oxymoronic -Philip Ochieng. 

 

Every Friday he writes a caustically witty column in which he gives grammar lessons to Kenyan newspaper writers by pointing out printed cases of incorrect usage of the language and then brilliantly weaving in topical themes to illustrate the "how to's" and the "how not to's." 

 

This week Ochieng wrote about the common mistake of pluralizing one's name. It would be wrong for instance, to say, "my names are Wangu wa Makeri Wahome" if the grouping of those distinct names is what forms "my name." A name could contain more than one name in it; and that I agree with.

 

But Ochieng goes off track when he equates having a name (which may contain multiple names such as Willy Brother Wangoto) and having "other names"outside a defined grouping.

 

You could correctly say "my name is Billy Jones" and proceed to name a hundred names contained in that name but incorrectly say "my name is Billy Jones" if Billy is what your other girlfriend calls you and Jones is a nickname you picked because you sound like James Earl Jones. But the reason why we normally wouldn't say "my names are" (unless we work for Kenyan newspapers) is because for people with multiple names, only one is required for a particular context. If your wife or girlfriend knows you by the name Sukaringuru, you would have had a lot of s’plaining to do the day you introduce yourself thus: “my names are Billy Sukaringuru.” I even doubt the whole sentence would come out!

 

Our duly appointed prime minister could therefore say, "My name is Raila Amollo  Odinga" but he cannot say "My name is Raila Odinga, Agwambo, Tinga, Wuod Akinyi, Nyundo, Hummer, Hammer, Tinga." Well, he could but I would know that he is lying.